Category Archives: news

GREG MORTON RETURNS TO THE DEBATERS

Attention all Star Wars geeks and comedy freaks! You don’t want to miss this show.

On Sat Jun 19, Greg Morton makes his second appearance on CBC’s The Debaters show, hosted by Steve Paterson. The topics will be, Darth Vader, Best or Worst Dad & Stay at Home Dads.

The Debaters celebrate dads this week as new father David Pryde tries to convince Star Wars fan and Dark Lord devotee Greg Morton that even though he did try to get his son to join the family business, Darth Vader remains the worst dad of all time.

Next up, domestic daddy Tim Nutt doffs his apron and throws down an oven mitt as he tries to prove to patriarchy propagator David Hemstad that “stay at home dad” is a job title any man can be proud of. We may be talking about fathers this week. but The Debaters remains the “mother” of all radio comedy shows. Catch the action Saturday at 1:00 PM on Radio One. It’s a good one!

Fans of The Debaters may recall the Greg Morton’s last debaters topic. Star Wars vs. Lord of the Rings. This knock down drag ’em out fight between comedians Greg Morton and Ron Sparks, now available on itunes.

Air Times

CBC
Network Times
Radio One
Saturdays at 1 p.m. (1:30 NT), Wednesdays at 11:30 a.m. (noon NT)
Sirius 137
Tuesdays at 1 p.m., Wednesdays at 3 a.m. and 4:30 p.m., Saturdays at 11 a.m., Sundays at 12:30 a.m. ET

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BOB & TOM ALL STARS VISIT JOPLIN & CINNCI

This week, the Bob and Tom All Stars visit Joplin, MO and Cincinnati, OH on another Canadian Mist sponsored tour!

Friday, March 12, Henry Phillips, Greg Hahn, Donnie Baker, Auggie Smith, and myself will be appearing at the Joplin Memorial Hall with host Chick McGee. Showtime is at 7:30 with a special meet and greet for a group of lucky show listeners at 6:45.

Saturday, March 13, the same crew are off to the 20th Century Theatre in Cincinnati, OH for two shows at 7:00 and 9:45! If you’ve never been to one of these shows before, I would highly recommend it.

What can you expect from me? Well, I certainly can’t pass up an opportunity to perform OBAMA MAN live. I may do OBAMA WANTS TO PULL THE PLUG ON GRANDMA. It was such a hit at the last All Star show and the audience really gets into it. I’ll also have a few surprises for anyone who has never seen my show before.

This is another Canadian Mist tour that should not be missed. Or should I say, another Canadian who should not be missed? ūüėČ

BILL BROWNSTEIN OF THE MONTREAL GAZETTE WRITES…

Greg Morton: mimics Barack Obama to the tune of Candyman

Greg Morton: mimics Barack Obama to the tune of Candyman

Photograph by: Debra Robb,



MONTREAL – To his surprise, Greg Morton has become the darling of the hip-hop Republicans. The Democrats, on the other hand, don’t know what to make of him. Morton is amused and just a little bit bewildered – particularly to learn there is such a breed as hip-hop Republicans.

Morton is a comedian, specializing in parody impressions. This reaction is the result of his tune Obama Man, which has gone viral on the Internet, with nearly four million hits. Morton, who plays the Comedy Nest tonight through Saturday, perfectly mimics Barack Obama to the tune of Candyman, but with these biting lyrics: “Alright everybody: AIG, Bank of America, Citigroup, First National, Lone Star! What do you want, One … Two … Three … Hundred Billion? Come on over! “Who can fix the mortgage? General Motors too? A bailout check for me. And a bailout check for you. Obama Man. …Yes, Obama Man Can. Who can give ya health care? Who can save the poor? Who can pick the teams that are in the final four?” You get the picture. But what makes the picture a little murkier is that Democrats are somewhat befuddled by someone they believe to be an African-American taking shots at Obama.

“I leave them all scratching their heads when they ask if I’m a Democrat or a Republican,” Morton muses. “When I tell them I’m a Canadian, then they’re really puzzled.” Yup, Morton is a Canuck. Born and bred in Woodstock, Ont., he is now based in Toronto, although he is a big attraction on the club circuit throughout the U.S. as well as Canada.

Now that the president’s approval ratings have plummeted in recent weeks, comics are becoming less reluctant to make Obama the butt of their gags. But Morton was one of the first wits out of the gate to make mirth of Obama.

“I realized early on that comedians were very leery about offending Obama. I also realized that I’d probably get a lot of attention if I did go after him. But I’m certainly an equal-opportunity insulter.” “A lot of comics are scared to do this, for fear of being branded racist. But that’s our job. If the president is king, then we’re court jester, and we should be able to make jokes about Obama when it’s warranted.” Morton followed up Obama Man with another tune, Obama in Mom Jeans, set to the music of Neil Diamond’s Forever in Blue Jeans. This tune emanated from the president’s garb at last summer’s major-league baseball all-star game. Obama tossed out the first pitch, but folks weren’t focused on whether it was a slider or a change-up. Rather many were struck by his garb – “mom jeans,” as pundits went on to describe his loose-fitting denims.

“Fact is that I really do admire Obama. I think he’s extremely intelligent. I just don’t agree with everything he does. And I can’t agree with those jeans at all,” Morton cracks.

Morton has received no official response from the White House about his compositions. “Not yet anyway, but my (U.S. work) visa comes up for renewal this year, and we’ll see how that goes.” It might go a little better now. To the delight of Democrats, Morton has also had his way with Sarah Palin. His most recent song, Obama Wants to Pull the Plug on Grandma – based on Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer – is inspired by the ex-Alaska governor’s rant about Obama wanting to create death-panels on the fate of seniors.

Sing along: “Here’s the way I understand it. The way it was explained to me. To save the healthcare system, they will shoot grandma. Like Old Yeller on TV.” Just for Laughs fest patrons may recall Morton doing his dazzling two-minute re-cap of the Star Wars trilogy – with dead-on impressions of Darth Vader, Yoda, Chewbacca the Wookie Monster et al in 2001. He’s still got that in his repertoire, along with newer material featuring Batman and the Joker – performing Deck the Halls as a duo.

Ever the joker, Morton also has Tiger Woods on his phone-answering machine: “Can you do me a favour? Can you take your name off my phone?” Sounds just like Tiger. “It should. It is him. Not me. Scares the hell out of people, too.” Morton feels the level of hysteria has reached epic proportions in the U.S. “It’s not the Excited States of America for nothing: A place where strangers can sneak into the White House to have dinner with the president, but where you can’t take your shampoo on an airplane.”

Greg Morton performs Jan. 22 and 23, Friday and Saturday, at Ernie Butler’s Comedy Nest, in the Pepsi Forum, 2313 Ste. Catherine St. W. Call 514-932-6378.

NUIT BLANCHE TORONTO / 2009 REVIEW

CN Tower pulsates to electronic music on Nuit Blanche, 2009

CN Tower pulsates to electronic music on Nuit Blanche, 2009

This past Saturday, I attended Toronto’s 4th annual Nuit Blanche sponsored by Scotiabank. ¬†A ¬†celebration of contemporary art in the heart of the city. ¬†This year, the event was attended by over 130,000 people! ¬†(Some of them blotto) The event ran from 7PM Sat. to 7AM Sun.

I said to my wife, “I’m up for the challenge. ¬†132 installations provided by 550 artist, spread out over three different sectors of downtown Toronto. ¬†(God knows how many square miles) ¬†Hell, we LIVE downtown! ¬†All we need do is to step outside our door, and partake in the festivities. ¬†Let’s do this. ¬†Let’s pull an all-nighter!”

After seeing only a handful  exhibits, we sheepishly retired to our home at 3:00 AM.  (Someone should have had a nappy-poo.)

Frankly, I’m not sure anyone could see everything unless it were carefully planned. ¬†Fortunately, the organizers provided an online digital guide. ¬†A paperless brochure, filled with artist names, statements, pictures and information.

Let’s say you’re looking at a work of contemporary art, but you have no idea who the artist is, the title of the piece or what the piece represents, or even if ¬†it’s art. WTF??? ¬†(The lines between contemporary art and reality are often blurred.) Simply take a digital snapshot of the icon next to the piece with your BlackBerry or iPhone camera, and all pertinent information will appear on screen.

If you want to locate that particular installation,  you can use the GPS function on your portable smart phone device.  Wow!  I LIVE IN THE  F@#$% FUTURE!  People were excitedly texting and tweeting each other, voting for their favorite installations.  It was very cool!

Here’s my final assessment of the evening… ¬†WE LOVED IT!

I would strongly encourage anyone thinking of visiting Toronto next fall, to include Nuit Blanche as part of their schedule. ¬†Hell, you’re going to see a lot of these landmarks anyway. ¬†Why not see them with drunk people?

Aside from a few novice art critics and some amateur drinkers who left behind their own versions of Jackson Pollock, I thoroughly enjoyed this all-night contemporary art thing.

You know what the best thing about it was?  The price.  Absolutely FREE!

“Hey honey, let’s go get pissed up and look at some modern art.

I will be posting more digital pictures and videos once they’re developed.

*Hats off to all the organizers and volunteers who helped the night run smoothly.

WOULD YOU SLEEP WITH THIS MAN?

WOULD YOU SLEEP WITH THIS MAN?

I LOVE YOU DADDY!

NO.  Not even if I were in a heroin induced coma.

Yesterday, Mackenzie Phillips, former child star on the 70’s sitcom, ‘One Dad At A Time,’ dropped a huge bombshell on the Oprah Winfrey Show. ¬†She revealed a family secret that would make even Jerry Springer blush. ¬†Reading a passage from her new tell-all book, she described ¬†how she woke up from a drug induced blackout to discover her panties around her ankles and her father having consensual sex with her. ¬†That’s right! ¬†Her famous father from the 60’s group, The MaMas and the PaPas. ¬†WTF? ¬†Does MaMa know PaPa has been sleeping with Baby? ¬†That is one Monday Morning I wouldn’t want to wake up to!

First of all, sex with your father is NEVER consensual.  Well, maybe in the Appalachians.

This show interview with Mackenzie Phillips, must have been part of Oprah’s new fall, feel good series, ‘Live Your Best Life.’ ¬†Lately, ¬†Oprah has had some very uplifting shows. First, she had the interview with Crack-ney Houston, hocking her new comeback CD, I LOOK TO YOU. ¬†(Or, as I like to call it, songs I sing to my pipe.) Then, she had a show about ¬†Connie Culp, the woman who had her face shot off by her husband, because she shot her mouth off one too many times. And now, may I present to you the latest addition to the Oprah Book Club. ¬†HIGH ON ARRIVAL. ¬†A little light reading for back-to-school.

This book is worse than airing your dirty laundry in public. ¬†This is, “I had a little accident, and HERE are the pants I pooped in!” ¬† YUCK!

Then, she revealed another revelation. ¬†When she was 18 years old,¬†Mick Jagger locked her in a room and had sex with her. ¬†Her father stood outside, loudly pounding on the door and protesting… “WHAT ARE YOU DOING¬†IN THERE¬†WITH MY DAUGHTER, AND MY WIFE?”

While telling the story, she seemed almost giddy and school-girlish . ¬†“C’mon, who wouldn’t want to sleep with¬†Mick Jagger?” ¬†… ah, ME! ¬†(Raised hand) ¬†Not without a body condom and a hot¬†Purell sitz bath. ¬†Remember, when you sleep with¬†Mick Jagger, you’re sleeping with a guy who (allegedly) ate a chocolate bar out of his Marianne Faithfull’s ass!

After all the dysfunctional details were revealed, her little anecdote about sleeping with Mick Jagger seemed almost normal. ¬†Welcome to the new ‘normal’ ¬†– sick –



Toronto Zombie Walk 2009

P9120008.JPG (Screening of Night of the Living Dead in Dundas SQ.)

I love zombies.

I mean, I hate zombies!

And yet, I’m drawn to them. ¬†I guess I love to hate zombies.

If you moan around me like a zombie, it irritates me. ¬†Please, ¬†don’t do that!

That’s why, this past Saturday, Sept. 12th, I had to attend the ¬†7th annual Toronto Zombie Walk.

Highlights included a zombie walk through downtown Toronto, a screening of the 1968 zombie hit, Night of the Living Dead, and the presentation of an honorary Canadian citizenship to director George A. Romero.

There were several people dressed as zombies.  One woman was dressed as Uma Thurman from Kill Bill Volume 1 ??? WTF?  What does Kill Bill have to do with zombies?  Can someone explain this to me?

Next time you watch Night of the Living Dead, listen to the music score. ¬†Doesn’t it sound a lot like the theatrical score of the Werewolf movie in the music video, Michael Jackson’s¬†Thriller.

URRRRRRRRRRGH!

Greg Morton attacked by Zombies in Dundas Square in Toronto

Greg Morton attacked by Zombies in Dundas Square in Toronto

Top 5 favorite Zombie Movies!

1) Night of the Living Dead (My first. I Saw this with my Dad at a late night screening in my hometown)

2) Dawn of the Dead (I love both the original and the remake shot in Toronto)

3) Shaun of the Dead (Hilarious!  Although I would never throw my records at zombies.)

4) Return of the Living Dead (Brrrrrrrrraaaaaaaains!  Hilarious!)

5) Resident Evil (Sorry Roger Ebert, but I love this Trilogy)  (The second one was shot in Toronto!)

Top 5 Zombie Video Games!

1) Resident Evil (All Games on Multiple Platforms)

2) Left 4 Dead (Xbox 360)

3) The House of the Dead OVERKILL (Wii)

4)  House of the Dead 2 / Typing of the Dead (Sega Dreamcast)

5)Dead Rising (XBOX 360)

HELLO? LADY? I’M ON TV!

South Point Casino, Host Venue of the Jerry Lewis Telethon
JerryLewisTelethon copyOn Sept. 7th, ¬†between 3:00 and 4:00 am Pacific Time, I will be ¬†appearing on the Jerry Lewis MDA Telethon! ¬†That’s 6:00 ¬†and 7:00 for you East Coasters!

I’ve been watching the telethon, every Labor Day since I ¬†was a kid.

Special thanks to Tony Camacho and Lorraine at Top  Draw Entertainment for helping make a life long dream  come true.

*check is in the mail Tony

Greg Morton Homecoming

They say you can never go home but on March 7th of this year, I returned to my hometown of Woodstock, Ontario to perform at a special fundraiser for the Woodstock Big Sisters and College Avenue Secondary School.

I will always remember the great teachers and staff at my former high school. (C.A.S.S.) Some of whom were a great inspiration to me.

I would like to extend a special thanks to my dear friend, Sandra Brown who made the whole thing possible.

In what seems like a previous life, Sandra and I first met at one of my teen dances. I was a mobile disc jockey back in the 80’s. I called myself, Greg Morton, that crazy DJ, and I used to put on costumes. (Kind of like now.) Sandra and a mutual friend of ours, Jeff Patterson, won first prize in a dance contest!

Here’s a copy of the online article I found from the local paper…

COMEDY NIGHT 2009

Comedy night brings cause $19,000
Posted By Hugo Rodrigues, STAFF WRITER ‚Äď Sentinel ReviewMarch 9 2009
The March 7 Comedy Night in support of Big Brothers Big Sisters of Woodstock and District and the College Avenue gym floor raised almost $20,000.
Big Brothers Big Sisters board member, CASS grad and comedy night organizer Sandra Brown said the event held at the Oxford Auditorium and featuring Greg Morton and Deb DiGiovanni raised approximately $19,000. The amount will be evenly split between the service agency and the high school’s gym floor fundraising campaign.

“We had close to 1,000 people there, which is more than the 750 we had out the last time,” Brown said Thursday. “Having two groups behind it helped us a lot– it was a bigger volunteer base to draw from and use to spread the word.”

Brown said e-mail and social networks also played a huge part in promoting the event.

DiGiovanni opened the night with an approximately 40-minute set, touching on her Tillsonburg roots and her experiences living and working in Toronto.

Morton followed, opening his set asking who’d moved the Springbank Snow Countess. He performed for over an hour, peppering his routine with local references and memories of his days living in the FriendlyCity. He capped off the routine with a string of impersonations, including Mick Jagger, James Brown, Prince and Tina Turner

Special shout out to my favorite comedian, Debra DiGiovanni

If anyone has any special photos of the event or memories they’d like to share, please send them to me at mrmorton2u@aol.com.

Obama Man Goes Viral! 2 Million Views on YouTube!

Well, it’s happened. Obama Man, the song parody about President Obama performed on The Bob and Tom Show just two months ago has reached over 2 million views. It’s simply mind boggling!

I have a few other clips that have been posted on YouTube like Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, and Hurricane MOFO, but none of them have surpassed 100,000 views.

2 weeks ago, I got a call from Tom of the Bob and Tom Show telling me the clip had gone viral. “Have you seen this thing?” I don’t know if you’re aware, but this clip has a million hits on YouTube.” Now, it’s a week later and it has reached over 2 MILLION. I’m simply gob smacked.

Since then, I’ve performed the song live at numerous venues across the county to a very positive response.

So what’s next? Well, there’s talk of a more visually elaborate version with revamped lyrics. I guess I’ll just ride the train and see where it takes me. I just hope I don’t have some kind of Susan Boyle breakdown!

Special thanks to everyone at the Bob and Tom Show! Without them, this wouldn’t be possible.

Comics Unleashed Prime Time

culogo1I am very happy to announce that Comics Unleashed will be airing in prime time.  You can watch it every Wednesday night at 9:PM E. 8PM C.

New York РWWOR-TV 9

Los Angeles РKCOP-TV 13

Chicago – WPWR-TV 50

Coming soon! ¬†A 24-hour HD television network COMEDY.TV featuring the world’s funniest comedians. ¬†(Including yours truly.)¬†

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